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Transcript of remembrance's Testimonial

linkage1951: Thank you for coming to Net Roots Nation with your quilt.

remembrance: You're very welcome.

linkage1951: And for the viewers, could you tell us your name?

remembrance: My name is Remembrance.

linkage1951: Remembrance?

remembrance: Uh-huh.

linkage1951: And can you tell us about you quilt?

remembrance: I have a stunningly beautiful quilt made by Sara R and her sister Ann. Umm, there are messages from kossacks or individuals in our community that wanted to provide support (to) the network of healing to the people who maybe needed to draw on that. And a friend of mine, Paradise50, when we told him that I had been diagnosed with cancer, he asked Sara R to make a quilt for me. And my thought at the time was, "I need to accept this, because I need to draw on energy and love." And also for the people who want to give this, because I know that they do, I couldn't say no...something that I thought was important to give and to take. Umm...so Sara R and her sister received these messages from people in the community, and she uses archival ink to transpose them onto the quilt fabric, and then she must have this huge warehouse of patterns because she chose really beautiful fabric to highlight the messages and the gift of caring and "we got your back -- you're going to be OK" that this quilt represents.

linkage1951: So it gave you hope.

remembrance: Yeah.

linkage1951: How many messages are on the quilt?

remembrance: I don't know. I haven't counted. Sometimes...umm... First few time I looked at it, I could really only look at it and really take in a few at a time because (the) messages are really poignant and they're very loving, (and) even from people I had never met before, that I'd never interacted with on line, had written just as beautiful a comment as people that I did know, that even had their talking with personally, you know, even through email and on the phone and (I'd) held and hugged. So it takes a while to get through it, to look at each block and really take in the meaning and what people are wanting to share.

linkage1951: Why were you hesistant in taking the quilt?

remembrance: I don't know that I was hesistant. Maybe I didn't express it the way that I thought about it earlier. Umm...I think I'm the kind of person that wants to give. I'm in the caring profession, the helping community myself, and so that's my nature. And so it's easier to do that than to take something, that I have to step back and say, "Now you're on the other side of it, and this is what it feels like for me to give." And if you said "no" to me, how would I feel and what would that mean to me? And so it really was a give- and-take equal on both parts.

linkage1951: Do you think letting go the resistance to be receptive to gifts  helped you?

remembrance: Sure. Yeah, I'm...I'm...I'm... I feel blessed. Umm...you know, when  you're diagnosed with a life-threatening illness or you're grieving or you've had an accident and you're injured, and life changes for you, umm...no one else really knows what the physical impact is, what the emotional impact is, because we can't feel that in each other, so in a sense there's an aloneness to it. But, but when you take this quilt into treatment with you, have it sitting on your lap when you're driving, you've got the hands of community around you, and you don't feel so alone anymore. You feel a lot stronger...yeah.

linkage1951: How many times have you read the quilt?

remembrance: I don't know...I have no idea.

linkage1951: Hundreds?

remembrance: I don't know.

linkage1951: You don't?

remembrance: I just don't know. I don't know.

linkage1951: Would you like to tell the viewers something some of those people  who have contributed to the quilt?

remembrance: Yeah, I'd like to share.

linkage1951: Yes, go ahead.

remembrance: OK, umm... This is from a special friend that I've not met I  person, but I know that if I did, she would be a dear friend of mine. She wrote:

"To me your grace and courage through this journey, I'll picture your spirit dancing, held up by love of your friends here. (To) Glen (my husband): I'm here for you any time as you support and care for your sweet wife and little one (who is my daughter). Enjoy big hugs under the beautiful quilt. Sending you loads of peace and love to all three of you."

See, this quilt was particularly special because it was really a family quilt -- my husband and my daughter and myself.

linkage1951: For your family.

remembrance: Yeah.

linkage1951: Supporting your family.

remembrance: Yeah. It was...the diagnosis that I got was the only thing in the past 12½ years since my husband and I have been together that rocked us. We've managed through everything, but this was scary...yeah.

(Pause as she looks at the quilt...)

This one is from another kossack and she writes: "Under this quilt, protection, like in a hiding tent. Within this quilt, joyful remembrance of puddle play and dreams. Upon this quilt, floating on the warm healing sea of our love."

It's a beautiful poem that she came up with that kind of captured some of the conversations we've had, some things she knew about me and make it very relevant and meaningful in my life...yeah.

linkage1951: Can you show the viewers the back and just hold it up a little?

remembrance: Sure. The pattern is called "Dandy," soothing colors of green and blue, a beautiful floral pattern...

linkage1951: And the message side...?

remembrance: The message side...oh, pardon me...has the four squares of messages and then block patterns of fabric, kind of nature...grass and trees and leaves...healing elements of our natural world.

linkage1951: Thank you so much for taking a moment and talking about your quilt with us.

remembrance: You're welcome. Thank you for having me.

linkage1951: OK.

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